Sex: Too Big or too Little a Deal?

If you work with students the topic of sex is bound to come up. 

Doug Fields has a joke where he says students want to know about sex and end times and if you can have sex during the end times.

The question I often get is, “What’s the big deal about sex?”  Do we make too big of a deal about it or do we not make enough of a deal about sex? Here’s what I think…

Unfortunately, I think society and even the church only talk about and address the surface of this issue.  Paul however digs deep into the results that sex actually have in 1 Corinthians 6:12-20.

I think when we address sex, as Paul did, we will be making the proper deal of a subject that is sensitive but extremely important.  Let’s look at what Paul said.

God the Father – 1 Corinthians 6:13-14

God the Father will raise our bodies at his second coming.  Because of this, the body is important and should be treated with as much care as the soul. Specifically, Paul says sex outside of marriage does damage.

God the Son – 1 Corinthians 6:15-17

We often forget but when you are a believer you are a member of Christ and one with him.  As a result, when you have sex with someone who is not your spouse it is not just about you and that other person.  It violates your relationship with Christ by joining Him to the person you have sex with.

God the Spirit – 1 Corinthians 6:19

A believer’s body is the temple of the Holy Spirit.  He lives inside of the believer, makes his home there.  As a result, our body does not just belong to us, but it also belongs to God.  So Paul is saying one of the main ways we can honour God with our bodies is to avoid sexual immorality.

So What?

So why does Paul tell the church of Corinth that any kind of sexual activity that it is not with your spouse is a bad idea?  –Because it violates a believer’s relationship with every person of the trinity.  That, in my books, is a big deal for anyone who says they want to follow Jesus and honour God with their lives.

So what do we tell our students about sex?

I think our great mistake is that we skate on the surface and just tell them to wait until they are married.  We say that they need to use perseverance and prayer so they won’t fool around with their girlfriend or boyfriend.  Then they watch a movie or music video and they are told it is one of the most pleasurable experiences of their life.

What would it look like if we got to the heart of the matter?

What would happen if we went deeper and taught the beauty of God’s plan for sex?  What would happen if we taught the spiritual ramifications of sex?  What would happen, if without advertising it to our students, we began to help them develop a theology of sex?

Call me crazy but if we dug down deep like this, I think we would see much more students understanding and following God’s plan for sex.

What are your thoughts?

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Tyson Howells

Tyson is the associate youth ministry director for Vanguard Youth Ministry Institute. He has been a youth pastor for many years in Winnipeg as well as in Edmonton. Tyson is passionate in seeing relational youth ministry that results in youth that are passionate about following Jesus. He still leads a small group at the youth group in his home church.